a rose by any other name ...

may feel like she's part of the wrong stem.

so, shakespeare decided that a name meant nothing when romeo had fallen for juliet. i can't say i agree.

i am all for not letting a societal convention define you if you don't want it to, but i am going to change my name ... and soon.

i've decided that i want my dissertation published under my maiden name, a name i had a very hard time parting with when i got married. and considering none of this divorce junk will be final by then, i'm going to go ahead and do a legal name change instead of waiting for the divorce-related court-ordered one to come along.

i've given it a lot of thought. i decided i would take my name back when i divorced regardless of the warnings about it being confusing for the kids. i figure that plenty of divorced women remarry and then they don't share a last name with their children. if that isn't confusing for them, then taking back my birth name shouldn't throw them over the edge.

and yes, i've thought about the what ifs. what if we don't divorce? well, then i have my maiden name -- the one i probably should have kept anyway. what if i do remarry? well, then i keep my maiden name. if he can't get that, i shouldn't be marrying him. how do you explain it to the kids? well, "i changed my name when i got married, but it didn't change who i was. so i figured that while i really care for daddy and enjoyed being a part of his family, i missed my name and want to take it back. you won't have to change your name when you get married, but you can if you want."

this is basically a professional move at the moment, and really it is one i considered for years. i even talked to him about it a few times, but it seemed too much of a hassle to go through for mere "want." well, it isn't now. i mean it is a hassle, but so be it! i'm worth the hassle :)